Project "Zheneke": Kyzhibek Kurmanakun kyzy initially wanted to give everything up and leave after getting married, but now she does not regret staying.

Евгения Комарова Society
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The heroine of the new publication in the "Жеңеке" section is Kyzhibek Kurmanakun kyzy.

Kyzhibek was born on February 1, 1995, in the village of Koo-Chaty, located in the picturesque Ailaykuu valley of the Kara-Kulja district in the Osh region. She has two older brothers and a sister in her family.

“I was the beloved and spoiled daughter, the youngest of four children. My childhood was spent in this beautiful village. I studied at the Aydyn-Köl secondary school and was an active student. After the ninth grade, full of ambition, I went to Bishkek with the dream of becoming a journalist. But I learned that to enroll in the journalism faculty, a high school diploma was needed. Nevertheless, I did not return home,” she recalls.

Kyzhibek enrolled in Bishkek Humanities University in the economics faculty, choosing the specialty of marketing, and graduated successfully. However, her childhood dream of journalism did not leave her, and she transferred to the journalism faculty in her third year. Unfortunately, illness forced her to take an academic leave, and she could not continue her studies, so her career developed in the direction of marketing.

After finishing college, she often fell ill and spent time at home.

“One day, a friend invited me out. We met, chatted, and on the way back, I met my future husband. This happened on October 13, 2014, on his birthday, when he turned 19. He turned out to be a friend of my friend,” Kyzhibek shares.

The next day, he asked for my friend's number and started calling. One day he invited me on a date, and when I learned he was from At-Bashy, I thought, 'Too far, I don’t want to communicate.' But he jokingly replied, 'You will fall in love with me.' Soon we began talking every day on the phone and meeting. At that time, he was in his second year at university and worked as a security guard.

Over time, sympathy grew between us, but after two years, quarrels began to arise. At one point, he said, 'I want to do a “söykö saluu” (engagement).' And so it happened — after four years of relationship, he proposed to me. I thought for a long time but eventually agreed. We decided to get married without a bride price and dowry. On my side, we held traditional bride send-off ceremonies, and his family organized a big wedding in Bishkek.

The day after the wedding, we went to At-Bashy. My mother-in-law went with us but soon left to work in Turkey. I remember how much I cried when she left.

The traditions here turned out to be significantly different from mine. Even the shape of boorsoks is different. I took on all household responsibilities and immersed myself in family life. There were moments when I wanted to give up and leave; I cried, but I tried because of my love for my husband,” she shares.

In At-Bashy, it is customary to greet elders, even if you do not know the person, by saying “Jashsynar.” This is what my husband’s younger brother, who was in second grade, taught me.

Gallery: Kyzhibek Kurmanakun kyzy.
“Getting used to my husband’s village, I sometimes played with his younger brother, riding a donkey. Once, I got on a stubborn horse — it turned out to be very fast, and I could barely stop it. Now I remember this with shame.

When I first arrived, I milked 6–7 cows, made butter, süzmö, and kaymak.

I am the eldest daughter-in-law in the house. My husband is Uluk Jyrgalbek uulu, from At-Bashy, born on October 13, 1995. In the family, he is the eldest son, with two younger sisters and a brother,” Kyzhibek recounts.

In their village, the newlyweds lived for a year before moving to Istanbul, where they worked alongside Uluk's mother. In 2020, during the quarantine, they returned to their native village, expecting the birth of their eldest daughter. Since then, they have lived in At-Bashy.

In 2021, they had a son. Soon their eldest daughter will turn 6, and their son will be 4 years old.

“Considering the children, I had few opportunities to work. But I don’t stay idle: I cook and supply mini-pizzas, sandwiches, corn dogs, and other food to stores. My husband is involved in livestock resale, and the children go to kindergarten.

Sometimes I think that if I wanted to, like other daughters-in-law, to move to the city, my husband wouldn’t mind. But I decided to stay close to him and support him. Thank God, we have been married for 8 years, and I have never thought about breaking up. We always said, 'If we work together, everything will work out.'

Two years ago, we separated and started from scratch. We bought land and are raising livestock. This spring we plan to pour the foundation for a new house.

Now my goal is to find a job in my specialty. I have already sent out my resumes. If I manage to find a job, I will accept the offer,” K. Kurmanakun kyzy reported.

She also plans to open a social media page and run a blog where she will share the traditions of Osh and Naryn, as well as interesting stories about the life of a daughter-in-law.

Her dream is to work in her profession and provide her children with a decent upbringing, as well as to open a small bakery.

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